Tuesday, July 27

MOtiVatE YOURSELF

Waiting for inspiration can be a lot light waiting for lightning to strike in the next county . . . if you're still stuck in your same old spot back home.
 
Many of the people I coach start by telling me, they just can't do it any more. It can be any number of things –going to work, doing the laundry, raising teenagers, living alone. It can be encapsulated into one precise statement – live my life this way. “I just can't live my life this way any more ,” is what they're really saying. The logical answer for these clients would be to change their life. As a coach I have the tools to help them do just that.
 
Sometimes, though, they are in such a funk they can barely force themselves to get out of bed each day. They complain of being exhausted, unmotivated, drained. “I just don't feel like it,” is their excuse when they haven't followed through with an agreed upon coaching plan. "I want to do it . . .it makes sense . . .I think it would work . . . if I ever felt like it."
 
I ask them, “What if you never feel like it? Are you going to lay around in your jammies for the rest of your life?”
 
This is usually followed by stunned silence that eventually ends with, “I never thought of it that way,” or something similar. I'm still waiting for somebody to tell me, “Yes, that's what I want to do,” because as a coach it would become my job to help them formulate a successful plan for a life in pajamas.
 
At lunch last week, some friends and colleagues were enthusiastically discussing the mind-body connection and emotional intelligence. We expounded on the benefits of just going through the motions, moving the body according to plan until the mind catches up and starts to feel like doing it – whatever it might be, and how there are so many people who don't see the wisdom in this phenomenal connection.
 
Being the baby-boomer, self analyzing, introspective inner children we are, we were practically giddy over the thought that no matter how profound your grief or depression, no matter the reasons that got you there, the quickest way out is by moving – actual physical movement of any kind.
 
With us that day was a wise woman well into her 80th decade. I noticed that she seemed to be amused by our animated chatter and almost cultist conviction to a concept that I realized came naturally to the women of her generation. Whatever the problem at hand, there was work to be done, laundry to be washed, meals to be cooked, children to be raised. It mattered very little whether one felt like doing it or not; they just did.
 
Certainly women then were somewhat disenfranchised of the freedoms and rights we have today and while I wouldn't endorse returning to those Father Knows Best days, there are a few things we can learn in looking back.
 
“I didn't have time to worry about whether or not I was happy,” my mother says. “I just did what had to be done and most times the problems took care of themselves.” My mother didn't know about things like adrenaline, endorphins and seratonin. She hadn't a clue that chemical reactions in the brain and hormonal secretions in her body could make her feel anything, good or bad. She did know that when she was angry she could clean her house from top to bottom in half the normal time, and when she was done she felt better. When my sister or I complained of menstrual cramps she knew that scrubbing the kitchen floor would take our minds off the pain and we'd forget all about it. She knew that worrying too much about anything only led to more problems. Probably most memorable to us all is that our mothers knew hard work was the sure cure for malaise.
 
“If you're bored, I'll give you something to do,” they told us, when we moped around the house. Suddenly, we were filled with a spirit of industriousness that had been so elusive only moments before.
 
So when my clients ask me, what they can do when they don't feel like doing anything, I tell them to first have a thorough physical checkup by a medical professional to rule out any underlying illness or clinical depression. Once they have a clean bill of health, I tell them to buy into Nike and . . .

Just do it!
 
Recraft Your Life and Reclaim Your Spirit.
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LISTEN TO YOUR INNER CUES

In teaching yoga classes, I often instruct my students to listen to their body for the inner cues; when to begin a pose, if and when to move deeper into a pose, and when to come out of the pose. We talk quite a bit too, about taking the practice of yoga off the mat and applying it to every day life. I remind them to use breath work to dial down tension and relieve fatigue, to align their posture and use strong muscles in daily tasks, and to quiet their minds and turn their focus inward for relaxation at the end of the day. But how does listening for an inner cue apply beyond the yoga mat?

With the rising cost of insurance, the escalating number of uninsured and the increase of stress related disease in America, we all have to begin taking a more active role in staying healthy. The more in tune we become to the subtle signals of our bodies, and the more we heed these cues, the closer we come to achieving wellbeing, or homeostasis – the state in which all functions and areas of the body are performing at an optimal level. Without homeostasis we are experiencing some level of disease.

Look closely at the word disease. Likely it conjures up all manner of uncomfortable reactions; cancer is a disease, diabetes is a disease, and let's not forget heart disease, lung disease . . . the dreaded list goes on.

If you break the word down into it's syllables you get dis – ease. Suddenly, some of the gruesome power of the word is diminished. In this context, it becomes understandable that all major and life threatening diseases begin with a simple dis – ease of the body. If we can fine tune our listening to pick up on those first cues, we can take the steps necessary to stop the progression to more serious and sometimes fatal conditions. How often do we wait until it's too late, before we listen to our bodies?

Consider the possibility that when we refuse to listen, our bodies force us to take notice. Consider further that perhaps this doesn't always manifest in disease. Take the case of a young woman I know quite well, working four different part time jobs trying to get ahead, and struggling to maintain a challenging relationship on her already over-booked schedule. Little ailments began presenting, and with too many jobs but no health insurance, medical bills only put more weight on her already burdened shoulders. Friend's cautioned her to slow down, doctors urged her to take it easy, recommending yoga or other mind-body practice to control her stress. She maintained that she could handle it, that she had no other choice.

And then she crushed her finger in a work accident and all four jobs came to a screeching halt. After reconstructive surgery and with a pin protruding from the finger tip, she can't handle much of anything right now.

Take a moment to think of your own persistent aches and pains. A client of mine describes playing tug of war with her partner for the last 24 years. Is it any wonder her physical complaints include neck and shoulder pain?
Is back pain plaguing you? What burden are you carrying that perhaps needs to be put down, or at least shared by another? Recurring bouts of laryngitis or other throat or mouth ailments? What words are you choking back that need to be spoken out loud?

In the April, 2004 edition of Prevention Magazine, Joan Borysenko, PhD, relates the story of her serious skin rash that turned out to be a dysfunction of her immune system. Reasoning that the skin and immune system are boundaries separating us from the outside world and defending against invaders, she decided to examine her emotional and behavioral boundaries. “A friend called me a human buffet – for inviting everyone to come in and have a bite,” she says in her article, Listen To Your Body. “The rash was an intuitive neon sign that said, close the buffet line or risk serious physical, financial, emotional, and spiritual illness.”

I don't suggest that we all throw away our doctor's phone numbers and start diagnosing and treating ourselves. Like Dr. Borysenko, I strongly recommend that you always seek appropriate medical advice. It's just not as simple as making the mind-body connection between what ails you and what's going on in your life. Even if you do listen to your cues and make the right connection, you'll likely still need medical help in many cases. But sharpening your intuition and answering your body's call can be a valuable tool in your arsenal to fight dis-ease and achieve health and wellbeing in body, mind and spirit.

Don't wait until your body forces you to listen; until you are already ravaged by disease.  Listen to your inner cues and you'll be well on your way to staying healthy, wealthy and wise.


Want to learn more about trusting your intuition?
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